Mateo in MEXICO: To Planch, Learning from mistakes, General Conf, and God's mercy

This was an interesting week. I feel liked I have never been so planched in my life... Planched is like a Mexican slang word for being burned. Burned by punishing words. hahaha. I swear I'm not a bad missionary. But people just like to planch me. Its like... I can never do anything right. I'll explain later maybe. Actually I will start with Monday in the evening.

So the Zone Leaders came to the District meeting that we had Monday night, just for me. Usually you might feel special, or flattered. But ya. No. So they came to read some Law of Moses scriptures with me and my comp about doing things that are not OKAY, like the baptism and confirmation in the same day. Yeah I knew it was bad, okay? But I guess I will give them credit because they kind of did the planching in a loving way. It was a little uncomfortable. But I mean it was necessary. At least I am now 100 percent positive that the Bishop does not have the authority to authorize an early confirmation. So I mean I won’t let it happen again... Pres also just told me the same thing - that it is bad. But I mean now I knoooow. Then, in the end they all congratulated us on the baptism. So yeah. It happened.

Then the week was good. We worked super hard. Brought lots of members with us to lessons. Had lots of lessons. And we had 32 lessons by Friday. Cause every week we are expected to have 30 at the end of Saturday. We always do. But this week we knew we wouldn’t be able to work Saturday so we had to work a little bit harder to get it all done by Friday night so we could just sit back and enjoy the CONFERENCE. And I was really able to sit back and enjoy the conference. We got lots of new fechas bautismales (baptismal dates) this week and I am super happy. In fact we are baptizing Gramps this weekend and I really hope his wife decides she wants to get baptized too, with him, so that they can get sealed in the temple!! That would be a dream. They both came to Conference. Grandma is cute because she was like “I already saw this last Saturday” (when she went to the Relief Society Conference), but then we had to explain that they are all different talks on different subjects and by different people. Haha she was convinced it was the SAME and wasn’t too impressed. She is just nervous because she might get baptized this Saturday too. But her hubby’s getting in da water this Saturday at ONE in the afternoon. Love him. So happy he is finally making this covenant with God. He LOVED conference and learned so so much. His son came too! Slowly M. (his son) is getting ready for his baptism. Wooohooo. Seriously it is amazing to see his change in view of the importance of the Gospel in his life. At first he liked the lessons but was like what’s the rush to get baptized??? And NOW he is coming to church every week, reading all about Mormon history, bought a Book of Mormon and Doctrine & Covenants and a Bible, and is in all of our lessons instead of being there when it is convenient. So great. Love this family. We had one lesson when everyone was having a laugh attack and really I felt so bad but there was no way we could talk. It started when M. got up from her chair to read but like broke the chair and it was just super awkward. Hahaha. uuugh.

Another family that is progressing has fechas for November and they are excited. Another investigator I have has so many doubts about prophets in this day, the Restoration, Jospeh Smith, and the Book of Mormon. Her church said she has to pick between the Mormons or them. So I think she might stop talking to us, which would be really sad. But the thing is I can help her with all her doubts. She is really just making them worse and worse and she isn’t motivated enough to sincerely pray and study/investigate. So it is like a brick wall. I really wish she could’ve heard Uchtdorf’s talk about doubting our doubts before we doubt our faith. It would've been an answer to her prayers and mine. She actually even committed to coming to that exact session. But she was a no show. I still don’t know why..... Satan is annoying. Back off hater. What else?...... I think we are slowly but surely finding new people. I am getting a little bit nervous about the changes that we have this upcoming week. In my next email you will know if I change or stay... ugh. I am worried. Not too worried though. I feel like I will stay here.

So then at Sunday conference after the morning session, one of our recent converts (who is like 40) wanted pictures with all the missionaries and was like putting her arms around us. I was dumb and didn’t say anything because I thought it was too funny and not appropriate to embarrass her right there. I was planning on telling her later in one of our lessons we would’ve had with her. But the Zone Leaders saw us and so they literally were yelling at me for not saying anything. I thought it was silly, but whatever. Then after all of the conferences they gave a big speech to all the missionaries about the opposite sex and made it a huge deal and I could tell like 80% of it was my fault... I understand that we need to say stuff if it is a problem but they were making it sound like we can’t even talk to the Hermanas. And I was a little bit shocked because they are the ones that always help us get references and give us food and are nice to us. AND THEN that night we ate with a family and after we left, one of the guys (who is a returned missionary and newlywed) talked to us and told us to stop having his mother in law come with us to visits with investigators because it looks inappropriate to see a single woman going with us to appointments. I was seriously so shocked and felt so awkward. So I have been planched on many occasions before to BRING MEMBERS with us to EVERY lesson possible. But then I was just told by a member to stop inviting his mother in law to come with us because it looks like something else??!?!?1 He told us to bring more men instead of women. First of all, we have invited him like 3 times and he flaked... and second, all the other guys are too busy.... So we ask the sisters- Especially if the lessons are with girl investigators. I was fed up. I felt super dumb. Like a failure. ACCA AWKWARD. And just annoyed due to a day full of being yelled at and thought of badly... Especially when I thought I was doing a good thing by involving willing members because the lessons are strengthening their testimonies and the testimonies of the investigators. So it was a tough night.

I think I came to the conclusion that we really do need to be more careful with our associations with the sisters of the ward... EVEN IF THEY ARE LIKE MY MOMS AGE. Haha.. Love you mom. Because this world is strange and thinks things when they shouldn’t think them. It really is tough because I don’t want to offend the sisters and un-invite them to appointments with us. I will try to think of something. Maybe we will just meet people at investigators houses instead of walking to the houses together. That might be what’s bad? I don’t know. It’s honestly ridiculous. But I know this is a trial of my faith. I will keep working hard and doing what I know is good. God knows what is right and that we are working our hardest to really build this ward up in all aspects: Investigators and Members.

Okay. Done with that rant. So I really LOVED CONFERENCE. I forgot my notebook so I don’t really remember the details and all but it was such an inspired conference. I loved Uchtdorf’s talk on Saturday and in the Priesthood session. I loved Eyring’s talks too.... and Monsons. So pretty much I am biased and think they those three are the best, with the exception of Holland talking about the subject of depression and mental health. It made me super emotional because I felt like it was super personal when thinking of some family members that struggle with those types of diseases. It was so inspired and amazing and beautiful. Then I just really think all of the talking about Chris-t-like attributes and applying his Atonement helped me remember the beauty of His life and sacrifice. Like that’s the whole point of conference - To really just come closer to Christ... through prophetic teachings, the commandments, and his gospel. It is so simple really. But it’s super great to hear all of the interesting talks that they give too. Haha. I loved it so so much. Maybe I’ll remember my notes and try to talk about my favorites next time but I really don’t remember details and who said what. But I loved it. The American gringos all watched it in a room with so much food. #nevergohungry

Well I love you guys so much. I’ll send pics in a sec. Sorry if this is boring or negative. I try to be happy and kind. Sometimes I take my own advice. I’m working on it. I know God has mercy on me. That’s what keeps me going when I am obviously imperfect and dumb. I am trying my best. My best really is pathetic. But He still loves me. That’s the best part about having this knowledge that I have gained from the mission. His love is an energy source. Love ya. Hope all is well. baii.

Con Amor,

Elder Macdonald